2 AM. Drunk. Called up your ex?
Accept it or not. We all have done it.
We’re drunk enough to be “out of senses” but yet, we know we are totally in our senses! So we pick up our phone – the number has been deleted long back, but our fingers, yes our fingers – they remember the number. Well if not, there’s this WhatsApp group from a year ago which will still show their number in members list, right?
The numbers are keyed in. We take a pause (dramatically: a sigh). What am I doing? I can remember what all things they did to me. It’s wrong. It’s wrong. This won’t end well.
We hit the dial button.
So what if it gets weird? We are drunk enough. If it goes wrong, we were too drunk. Out of our senses. Good enough excuse. Hah!
And if it all goes well – Well, what exactly then? Patch up, chit chat, be friends? No, Not really. But the dial tone is already on.
By this point we are probably wishing that they don’t pick up. Be asleep. Be on silent. Because definitely, next morning when I get a call back I’m not going to answer!
And in the span of few dial tones we’ve already prepared a list of our excuses.
Accept it or not, this drunk ex call is like the “one last step” of a breakup. Everything suddenly becomes so clear – why we broke up, why we shouldn’t ever think of going back, why this call was so important – because they’ve moved on, and you, like a needy little girl or boy call them up! (well, I hope in some cases, this actually results in a patch up).
Hurts your ego, right? That’s where it ends. That’s what the closure is, if your breakup wasn’t a good enough closure for you. If all the arguments and smashing each other’s stuff didn’t give you enough closure.
You see, some of us are really, really optimistic. And the others - I don’t think they would even think of calling. Well, for the optimistic ones, this 2 AM drunken activity may or may not go very well. You might get mocked at. Your ex might just ignore you without a call back, you might just start arguing again – various possibilities.
I can’t ask you to weight all these possibilities when you dial – you’ll be too drunk. Instead ask yourself right now (hopefully you’re sober while reading this) – Do you want to call them? Is there something unfinished? Do you really need to hurt your ego to get over them? Is there something you need to share with them? Call them up if you feel so. Get a closure (or get another chance), but don’t wait for a 2AM!
Oh yes, and be supportive your friends who are calling their ex. Remember: They are drunk enough! Hah!
Not many of us experienced adulthood with clear goals, set priorities and perfect values. Somewhere, someday, we were all lost. Weren’t we? Someday we had asked ourselves - where am I heading? Why am I here? What am I supposed to do? Why am I even alive?
For some, the search ends up with perfect answers, but for some, it’s an endless toil, maybe even futile.
“Finding Myself” is neither an account of my search for meaning, nor is a book of ideal answers to your questions, it’s a tiny little guide book to help you find your own answers.
As you answer your way through this book's ten chapters, connecting with various aspects of your life, try to analyze your answers. Every chapter has a guided framework which should be used by you for analysis. The whole process sums up to answer one single question “Who Am I?”
It starts with guidelines to analyze your current situation, drawing a perspective for your life. Subsequently, you will be guided to delve deeper into your memories,understand people in your life and their influence by answering various questions and taking different tasks as mentioned in the chapters. Through various chapters, you will be able to understand various aspects like family, friends, success, failure and how they matter to the you. In the end, you will be ready with a definite direction you would want to go, clear about what you most want out of your life, how you want it, and most important of all, what defines you.
Diary : My Search for an Absolute.
Sometimes it would just feel insufficient, inadequate. As if there’s something missing and I am grappling in the dark. It’s like hallucinations. I see things that are not there – sometimes I can’t differentiate between reality and beliefs. But I can’t keep hurting myself from imaginations. And I know these are mere imaginations because they’ve happened before. .. Read more
A day of change
Nobody’s problem is small, but definitely not superior to others. Even the tiniest one can hurt a lot. And this happens to all of us - ‘Ah! This sucks! @$#%*’
This happened to me around two years ago.No friends, bad job, not accomplishing what I had thought I would, bad living conditions, strained relationships, and the worst financial condition. On top of that, I kept cribbing.
Until that one day, I decided to take two steps- first identify your misery and then don’t multiply the misery by talking about it . And I do feel, changes started there. I don’t have a fool proof plan, I have had days when I deviated from my resolution to not complain, and to give up. But these helped.
Identifying- I remember the feeling that I am in some space where ...Read More